Thursday, September 21, 2006

By The Newz Czar

NEW YORK – Venezuelan "President" Hugo Chavez spoke before another captivated audience attending a party in New York. The party, held at a local McDonalds, was to celebrate the eighth birthday of Charlie Williams. Approximately one dozen third graders had just sat down to eat their Happy Meals when the Venezuelan President and his security force entered the fast food restaurant. Chavez immediately began his speech, confusing all those in attendance including eight year old Juan Melendez, the only Spanish speaking person there.

When later asked about the speech, little Juan said all he could understand was "something like President Bush is the devil and eats children, or something". Chavez spoke at length for approximately ten minutes before saying "Gracias".

The only response from the audience was a seven year old boy named Jaden who asked Chavez the following question: "Mister, why are your lips wider than your eyes?" Chavez apparently then scowled at the boy while pointing at him, and abruptly turned and left the restaurant with his security force quickly in tow.

The party happily resumed at that point, and it is reported that Charlie Williams got everything he wanted for his birthday except for a baby brother.